Disabled by Culture

This blog is mostly for quotes. The main topics are disability, culture, LGBTQ-stuff, and feminism.

Quote Post

Society has allowed rapists to define what resistance is: screaming, crying, scratching, pushing, kicking, biting, punching. I didn’t resist like that. My resistance was to wriggle a bit, turn my head away when he tried to kiss me, try to stop his hand going into my bra and knickers, push him ineffectually, talk about wanting to get my cab; all things which normal men recognise as not being enthusiastic participation when they are engaging with women but pretend it’s a grey area when they talk about rape. Rapists have managed to get society to believe, that what I did, was consent.

Because I didn’t resist in the way rapists - and society - say that women should resist, they define our non-participation as consent.

—

A section of the article “How I became a rape victim”

(via sociolab)

BOOM, rape culture at work… Can I also add, when you are in a situation that involves rape or you think might involve rape or looks like it might involve rape in a few minutes, its usually pretty scary to scream and kick… Especially if you know this person and sometimes might even care about them and think they care about you too. It is much more likely that you’ll say “No.. Lets stop.. I don’t want to right now..” etc

(via jojoholmes)

(via unconforming)

Posted in tw rape culture rape interpersonal trauma sexual assault | 18,665 notes
Quote Post
Today we know that being dependent on hostile or severely misattuned caregivers interferes with the brain development necessary to become a focused, thoughtful, and well-regulated human being. Early exposure to danger molds the brain to be vulnerable, to make a person more irritable, impulsive, suspicious, and compelled to engage in fight-or-flight reactions.
— Bessel A van der Kolk
Posted in trauma child development cptsd ptsd attunement developmental trauma | 18 notes
Text Post

You are allowed to have really good days for no real reason and really bad ones for no real reason. You are allowed to feel like shit and ten minutes later, think everything in the world is perfect. You dont need a reason to feel, emotions are a great part of the human experience, don’t deny them.

(Source: starsinthegutter, via lesbianlegbreaker)

Posted in dbt emotional fluctuations self acceptance | 5,184 notes
Quote Post
Some people might claim that my mother has no idea how systems of oppression work. Some might also claim that her focus on survival means she has internalized the system’s logic so that she oppresses herself. But get this: my mom has a different—but extremely deep—understanding of how systems of oppression work. She interacts with them daily, fighting to survive despite structural disadvantages. Working class laborers don’t need a physician to know that they’re straining their bodies or an economist to know that they’re being exploited. Most of the time they don’t even need organizers writing articles about “the struggle” to know that it’s there and it’s theirs. The lived experience of these oppressions is not only real, it’s indispensable. No movement is legitimate without it. We don’t do justice to mothers like mine when we alienate them by privileging analytical understandings of systems of oppression.
—

Ngoc Loan Tran, “My Movement Mom”

That is…. Every damn thing I’ve been trying to say, for years, about academic understandings of oppression, in a nutshell. I get so frustrated with it I could smash my head on a wall. Not only don’t you need academic understanding, you don’t even need understanding of language, any language (and I’m talking about language disabilities here) to understand this stuff in your bones. I used to say, “You don’t need to know the word freedom to know when it’s being taken away from you.” And I just… I’m so glad someone is talking about this because everywhere on tumblr all I see is people discovering academic models of oppression and forgetting direct experience and approaches that don’t fit the academic mold.

I’m not good at abstractions and ideologies, and I’m less and less able to fake it, so this stuff has always felt like hands pushing me away. People thinking they’re better than me because they’ve discovered how to use all the perfect ideas fit them together make jargon about something…. Something I feel in every bone and every pore and everywhere, something I react to from my guts, something I don’t do academically, and often the academic stuff feels like poison to my brain, then my brain wants to throw up to get it out of my system so I can just act on what I know do what I need to do.

(via youneedacat)

(via survivorwaver)

Posted in direct experience academia elitism jargon oppression lived experience | 82 notes
Text Post

Respect adaptive technology

realsocialskills:

Technology is amazing.

It means that we don’t all have to be subsistence farmers. And that we can live in places with deadly cold climates. And that we have safe water. And that we can go places quickly that used to take days of walking. And that we can communicate with people on the other side of the world.

These are all good things. And they’re all things that we can take for granted, because depending on technology makes it possible.

And yet - when a person with a disability uses technology which most people don’t use, people say many versions of this:

  • Well, I used to use PECS with him, but he can say a few words if he really tries, and I didn’t want him to become dependent
  • She can walk. I’ve seen her. Why is she using a wheelchair?

No matter what you use, as a disabled person, someone is likely to say that you shouldn’t be using it and should be trying harder not to depend on technology.

It isn’t reasonable. And bearing that in mind makes life easier.

(via survivorwaver)

Posted in disability adaptive technology mobility mobility aids disability aids | 222 notes
Photo Post
dem-queer-animals: awesome-everyday: shorterexcerpts: thecallus: theatlantic: The Cheapest Generation: Why Aren’t Millennials Buying Cars or Houses? What if Millennials’ aversion to car-buying isn’t a temporary side effect of the recession, but part of a permanent generational shift in tastes and spending habits? It’s a question that applies not only to cars, but to several other traditional categories of big spending—most notably, housing. And its answer has large implications for the future shape of the economy—and for the speed of recovery. Read more. [Image: Kagan McLeod] It’s safe to say that a decent number of Tumblr users are a part of the Millennial generation. So, tell us: Do you own a car or house? If not, why? IT’S BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO DISPOSABLE INCOME YOU THUNDERING IDIOTS. Fucking preference has nothing to do with it. 50% of college graduates have no job! They all have the most student loan debt ever! What are you asking this question for?! Also: housing is a good bit more expensive now. My parents got a 15-year mortgage on a new house in the mid-70s. The house was $32,000. Average home price in that area now? $190,000. So, home prices went up. Food prices went up. Health care prices went WAY UP. Rent prices went up. Higher education went up so damn high that some of us forgo that all together. Energy prices went up. Car prices went up. Prices of prices went up. We also pay cell phone bills, internet bills, data plans, text plans, online subscriptions, cable/satellite tv, netflix, DVR subscriptions — bills that didn’t even exist 30-40 years ago. We also use computers and smartphones and microwaves and other consumer electronics that didn’t exist 20-50 years ago. We need medications and doctors and contact lenses and tampons and maxi pads and other things that cost money just to be alive and keep us healthy. Most of us can’t afford to: Get married and have a “Traditional” big wedding Buy a house Buy a new car PLAN to have children Take two, consecutive weeks of vacation. Jobs that paid 50k in the late 1990s now pay between 30-35. Interest rates that favor consumers have gone down. So I say, no. We are not choosing not to buy homes. We’re not choosing to take the bus in cities where there’s no good public transit. WE ARE NOT CHOOSING TO LIVE WHAT SOCIETY DEEMS AS AN UNDESIRABLE LIFESTYLE. Don’t even get me started on the fact that these two people in the picture are young white hipsters. Young black and brown folks have been forgoing homeownership and buying new cars for decades, this shit isn’t new, pal. You’re just acting like this shit is new because it’s hitting white folks. anyway, my point is: We are fucking broke. read the commentary above ^^ View high resolution

dem-queer-animals:

awesome-everyday:

shorterexcerpts:

thecallus:

theatlantic:

The Cheapest Generation: Why Aren’t Millennials Buying Cars or Houses?

What if Millennials’ aversion to car-buying isn’t a temporary side effect of the recession, but part of a permanent generational shift in tastes and spending habits? It’s a question that applies not only to cars, but to several other traditional categories of big spending—most notably, housing. And its answer has large implications for the future shape of the economy—and for the speed of recovery.

Read more. [Image: Kagan McLeod]

It’s safe to say that a decent number of Tumblr users are a part of the Millennial generation. So, tell us: Do you own a car or house? If not, why?

IT’S BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO DISPOSABLE INCOME YOU THUNDERING IDIOTS. Fucking preference has nothing to do with it. 50% of college graduates have no job! They all have the most student loan debt ever! What are you asking this question for?!

Also: housing is a good bit more expensive now.

My parents got a 15-year mortgage on a new house in the mid-70s. The house was $32,000. Average home price in that area now? $190,000.

So, home prices went up. Food prices went up. Health care prices went WAY UP. Rent prices went up. Higher education went up so damn high that some of us forgo that all together. Energy prices went up. Car prices went up.

Prices of prices went up.

We also pay cell phone bills, internet bills, data plans, text plans, online subscriptions, cable/satellite tv, netflix, DVR subscriptions — bills that didn’t even exist 30-40 years ago. We also use computers and smartphones and microwaves and other consumer electronics that didn’t exist 20-50 years ago.

We need medications and doctors and contact lenses and tampons and maxi pads and other things that cost money just to be alive and keep us healthy.

Most of us can’t afford to:

  1. Get married and have a “Traditional” big wedding
  2. Buy a house
  3. Buy a new car
  4. PLAN to have children
  5. Take two, consecutive weeks of vacation.

Jobs that paid 50k in the late 1990s now pay between 30-35. Interest rates that favor consumers have gone down.

So I say, no. We are not choosing not to buy homes. We’re not choosing to take the bus in cities where there’s no good public transit. WE ARE NOT CHOOSING TO LIVE WHAT SOCIETY DEEMS AS AN UNDESIRABLE LIFESTYLE.

Don’t even get me started on the fact that these two people in the picture are young white hipsters. Young black and brown folks have been forgoing homeownership and buying new cars for decades, this shit isn’t new, pal. You’re just acting like this shit is new because it’s hitting white folks.

anyway, my point is: We are fucking broke.

read the commentary above ^^

(via bigfatfeminist)

Posted | 18,761 notes
Quote Post
If you are queer, or trans, or have mental illness, or all of the above, you probably know something about the perils of presenting yourself as you really are. Dan-Savage-style coming-out narratives notwithstanding, many of us who are placed socially in these ways find that we cannot be completely authentic in all aspects of our lives. I definitely want to express myself, but I have to balance that against other needs, like being able to make a living in a capitalist society. If I dressed the way I’d prefer to, if I talked more openly about the times when my depression and anxiety prevent me from getting work done, I might find it harder to fit in, to stay attached to a professional group, to stay employed, than I already do. So instead, I wear T-shirts and cargo pants, and I let people think (at times) that I’m merely disorganized or not that committed to what I do.
In my opinion, it takes a lot of privilege to assume either that greater authenticity leads to greater happiness, or that the only reason you would leave who you are at the door when you step or roll into work is the formal, organizational structure of the place where you work.
— Structure and Justice | Geek Feminism Blog (via brute-reason)

(via cereal-for-supper)

Posted in identity passing as cis passing as neurotypical stigma capitalism gender expression queue | 905 notes
Quote Post
Identity is not a bunch of little cubbyholes stuffed respectively with intellect, race, sex, class, vocation, gender. Identity flows between, over, aspects of a person. Identity is a river – a process.
— Gloria Anzaldúa (via megamindinhd)

(via xicanaxingona)

Posted in identity identity formation queue | 3,496 notes
Quote Post
Eventually you forgive people for not knowing about you the things you’ve spent your life keeping from them.
— Robert Brault (via creatingaquietmind)
Posted in queue | 2,621 notes
Text Post

Trying to fit society’s beauty standards

motivate-me-to-123:

edrecoveryprobs:

image

Nailed it.

(via rescueeffect)

Posted in beauty standards moving gif queue | 14,386 notes
Text Post

nowherezone11:

“The romance industry conflates finding love with looking a certain way, and it’s hard even for the strongest of us not to internalize messages about the way we look. And worse, these messages are normalized. Just think of things people say when they are getting ready to date someone: ‘He’s cute,’ ‘He’s short,’ ‘He’s kind of chubby,’ ‘He’s tall and fine.’ Or men: ‘I prefer slender girls,’ ‘I’m not really into fat girls,’ ‘I prefer Asian chicks,’ and on and on. It is completely acceptable to say the most appalling things about the way people look when it comes to dating, and if someone is called out for it, their opinion becomes a matter of ‘preference.’ What gets ignored in calling this level of categorization ‘just preference’ is a history and culture of mainstream advertising that impacts our psychology, causing us to actually want to respond to certain things over others. It’s hardly a coincidence that people are attracted to images of femininity that have been beaten into their psyches….We are taught to prefer certain things over others, and when we repeatedly see the same exaggerated images of femininity and masculinity, we internalize a specific standard of beauty and begin to strive for it unconsciously. Considering the exaggerated nature of these kinds of images, preference is not really a ‘preference’; it is more like a culturally sanctioned fetish.”

— Samhita Mukhopadhyay, Outdated: Why Dating Is Ruining Your Love Life (via eibmorb)

(Source: brute-reason, via imfantasyparade)

Posted in advertising beauty standards enculturation attraction | 1,581 notes
Quote Post
Lewis’s Law (coined by journalist Helen Lewis) holds that ‘the comments on any article about feminism justify feminism’.
—

I genuinely feel that my existence is justified by this Wired piece.  (via helenlewiswrites)

I love this so much! Am now adopting “Lewis’s Law” into my writing and speech forever more!

(via burnthispress)

The only reason to read the comments, I guess?

(via magpieandwhale)

(via yellow-dress)

Posted in feminism queue | 3,592 notes
Photoset Post

likeafieldmouse:

Jen Stark - Abyss (2011) - Hand-cut paper, wood, foamcore, glue and light

(via autie-turtle-cat)

Posted in lgbtq it's like tumblr rainbow queue | 3,354 notes
Photoset Post

(Source: kerryswashington, via fyeahkerrywashington)

Posted in Kerry Washington some other people | 133 notes
Photoset Post

(Source: rooneymara, via alienaristocrat)

Posted in moving gif gif set silver linings playbook good movie queue | 85,078 notes