Disabled by Culture

This blog is mostly for quotes. The main topics are LGBTQ-stuff, feminism, trauma, dissociation, and child development.

ellesugars:

coagulates:

The fact that I end every sentence with ‘idk’ is a really good reflection of my self esteem

"A very specific way some young women express a sense of incompetence is by claiming ignorance, not about something specific, but in general, by uttering the words, “I don’t know.” The phrase “I don’t know” may be used as a means of filling space, changing the subject, weakening an otherwise clear statement, or contradicting a specific claim of knowledge. Some discourse theorists have claimed that “I don’t know”, used in these ways, serves a politeness or social leveling function. By liberally peppering speech with these non-conventional uses of the phrase, a speaker mitigates against the possibility that she might seem arrogant, and she can hedge statements of fact so as not to appear positional or argumentative."  —The Fabric of Internalized Sexism, Journal of Integrated Social Sciences (2009)

(Source: slimeeeman, via sociologicallyinsignificant)

The trend of labeling women “crazy” is part of the culture that socializes women to go along to get along. When women are told over and over again that they’re not allowed to feel the way they feel and that they’re being “unreasonable” or “oversensitive”, they’re conditioned to not trust their own emotions. Their behavior – being assertive, even demanding or standing up for how they feel – becomes an “inconvenience” to men and they’re taught not to give offense and to consider the feelings of others before their own.

Sept. 17 1:10 pm

naturalharmonics:

alliterativealec:

dynastylnoire:

justice4mikebrown:

WHOA

HOly shit that second link

Holy fucking shit.

(via mmm314159)

Most of us have had the experience of being ‘taken over’ by a part of ourselves which we didn’t know was there. We say ‘I don’t know what got into me.’ This is generally a negative experience, although it can be positive too. The way in which we usually recognize the presence of a subpersonality is that we find ourselves, in a particular situation, acting in ways which we do not like or which go against our interests, and unable to change this by an act of will or a conscious decision. This lasts as long as the situation lasts—perhaps a few minutes, perhaps an hour, perhaps a few hours—and then it changes by itself when we leave this situation and go into a different one. As long as fifteen years ago it was possible for a good and quite uncontroversial text on social psychology (Middlebrook 1974) to say things like “Thus the individual is not a single self, but many selves, which change somewhat as the individual shifts from situation to situation and person to person. We are, in short, what the situation demands.
— John Rowan, Subpersonalities: The People Inside Us

curvellas:

talk to kids like they’re people and take full interest in what they’re saying because they’re forming their personalities and it’s really vital that they know that their opinions are important and what they have to say deserves validation and respect. so when your three year old niece tells you that dragons don’t like cupcakes because the color blue is a spoon you better nod your head and ask her to explain more about that. 

(via must-become-a-lion-hearted-girl)

Mainstream movies are generally stories of men’s lives, which revolve around men. And then we have this sub genre called “chick flicks” which are stories of women’s lives, which when you look at them a little more closely, you realize that they generally revolve around men’s lives too. They revolve around trying to get a man, trying to get love, get married, get pregnant…
— Caroline Heldman, Associate Professor of Political Science Occidental College - in response to the fact that only 16% of protagonists in movies are female. (via sadwhitegrrl)
Someone once told me that human beings have three dimensions: how you see yourself, how others see you, and how you want others to see you. The closer the distance between the three dimensions, the more at peace you are and the more stable you become.
Marwa Rakha (The Poison Tree)

(Source: psych-facts, via agirlcalledchris)

an-andreja-pejic-blog:

By Blaine Zuckerman

It’s one of the final steps in her transition – from androgynous male model Andrej to the woman she has always wanted to be, Andreja.

In an clip exclusive to PEOPLE from Andrej(a) – The Documentary, Andreja Pejic is in her hospital bed, still recovering from sex reassignment surgery. Chatting on her cell phone, she tells a friend that she has been “optioned” – the fashion term for being put on hold – for a Donna Karan fashion show.

"I might [still] have a catheter," Pejic says. But having walked runways for Marc Jacobs and Jean-Paul Gaultier, the 23-year-old knows that when fashion calls, she’d better answer. Ever the optimist, Pejic says of her possible medical accessory, "That could be a look."

The film, which depicts Pejic’s physical, emotional and professional journey from man to woman, is directed by Eric Miclette and partially funded by a Kickstarter campaign which has raised more than $24,000 so far. Actor Jared Leto has also shown support for the film.

"I wanted to show the whole experience," explains Pejic, who says she not only hopes to demystify the trans process but also help "young kids out there who are going through similar struggles."

That’s why she gave filmmaker Miclette full access, allowing him to document nearly every aspect of her journey. “I was there the whole time,” says Miclette, who adds that there were moments when he struggled with not setting down his camera to comfort Pejic.

The film, which Miclette started as a passion project more than a year ago, shows some of those sad moments, but plenty of uplifting ones as well. Viewers eventually learn that Pejic did end up walking in the DKNY show, but she hasn’t yet had her first official post-op photo shoot.

"I still haven’t been shot as a woman," Pejic told PEOPLE exclusively. "With fashion, it’s all about timing and holding out for the right thing."

In the meantime, she’s busy going to castings and having meetings. When asked about her personal life and dating, she hesitates. “That’s the thing,” she says. “I haven’t really had the time.”

But the model has made time for her family since the surgery. In the past few months, she’s traveled to Europe to catch up with her mother and see her grandmother. “We had lots to talk about,” says Pejic of reuniting with her mom. “We had mother-daughter conversations for the first time. It was lovely.”

—From People.com

(via iamacollectionofmiscellanyandtea)

Supermodel Andreja Pejic comes out as trans

gaywrites:

Supermodel Andreja Pejic, known in the fashion industry for her stunning and often androgynous modeling of both men’s and women’s clothing, has come out as a transgender woman.

Pejic says she will only model women’s clothing from now on, and reportedly has the full support of her friends, family and agency.

Pejic said in a statement, “To all trans youth out there, I would like to say respect yourself and be proud of who you are. All human beings deserve equal treatment no matter their gender identity or sexuality. To be perceived as what you say you are is a basic human right.”

She also told Style.com, “I figured out who I was very early on—actually, at the age of 13, with the help of the Internet—so I knew that a transition, becoming a woman, was always something I needed to do. But it wasn’t possible at the time, and I put it off, and androgyny became a way of expressing my femininity without having to explain myself to people too much.”

Amazing! Congrats to her! 

ravensmuse:

One of the things that a LOT of progressives have a problem with is classism. “DON’T SHOP AT WALMART! Buy local and organic!” etc. and they totally fail at realizing some people can’t afford other options, if they have options at all. Our struggles are different. Do what you can when you can. Raise awareness. But stop assuming everyone has the same opportunities and abilities.

(via raposadanoite)

A study on masculinity and aggression from the University of South Florida found that innocuous – yet feminine – tasks could produce profound anxiety in men. As part of the study, a group of men were asked to perform a stereotypically feminine act – braiding hair in this case - while a control group braided rope. Following the act, the men were given the option to either solve a puzzle or punch a heavy bag. Not surprisingly, the men who performed the task that threatened their masculinity were far more likely to punch the bag; again, violence serving as a way to reestablish their masculine identity. A follow-up had both groups punch the bag after braiding either hair or rope; the men who braided the hair punched the bag much harder. A third experiment, all the participants braided hair, but were split into two groups: those who got to punch the bag afterwards and those who didn’t. The men who were prevented from punching the bag started to show acute signs of anxiety and distress from not being able to reconfirm their masculinity.
soleysoul:

genderpunk-dragon:

bandersnatchery:

"Vancouver School Board Introduces Gender-Neutral Pronouns"

"Students and teachers in Vancouver can now use the gender-neutral pronouns "xe," "xem," and "xyr." The move is designed to accommodate students for whom "he" and "she" does not fit or is deemed inappropriate…
"The newly coined pronouns — xe, xem, and xyr — are pronounced to rhyme with the genderless plurals "they," "them," and "their," and all starting with the "z" sound. So phonetically speaking, they’re pronounced "zey, "zem", and "zare.""

(Source: io9)
Click here to read the full article.

the article doesn’t do the issue justice.
the issue regarded policy change, where the vancouver school board’s (VSB) LGBTQ+ advisory committee re-wrote existing policy to protect staff and students falling on the queer and trans spectrums. 
the policy revision includes
-they/them/their and non-traditional pronouns being recognized by the school system
-required used of preferred names and pronouns by all staff and students
-preferred names/pronouns on all school records
-gender-accesible washrooms and change rooms available to those who require them
-disciplinary action taken against those who act in a discriminatory or hateful manner towards students, staff, and families falling on the queer and trans spectrums
—————-
the consultation was the longest ever done by the VSB, with over 120 speakers spread across 3 meetings. 
the process also resulting in two school board trustees being ejected form their party’s caucus, due their discriminatory actions and arguments. 
these are links to stories by vancouver media about the issue
CBC
metro news
global BC
huffington post


WOW

soleysoul:

genderpunk-dragon:

bandersnatchery:

"Vancouver School Board Introduces Gender-Neutral Pronouns"

"Students and teachers in Vancouver can now use the gender-neutral pronouns "xe," "xem," and "xyr." The move is designed to accommodate students for whom "he" and "she" does not fit or is deemed inappropriate…

"The newly coined pronouns — xe, xem, and xyr — are pronounced to rhyme with the genderless plurals "they," "them," and "their," and all starting with the "z" sound. So phonetically speaking, they’re pronounced "zey, "zem", and "zare.""

(Source: io9)

Click here to read the full article.

the article doesn’t do the issue justice.

the issue regarded policy change, where the vancouver school board’s (VSB) LGBTQ+ advisory committee re-wrote existing policy to protect staff and students falling on the queer and trans spectrums. 

the policy revision includes

-they/them/their and non-traditional pronouns being recognized by the school system

-required used of preferred names and pronouns by all staff and students

-preferred names/pronouns on all school records

-gender-accesible washrooms and change rooms available to those who require them

-disciplinary action taken against those who act in a discriminatory or hateful manner towards students, staff, and families falling on the queer and trans spectrums

—————-

the consultation was the longest ever done by the VSB, with over 120 speakers spread across 3 meetings. 

the process also resulting in two school board trustees being ejected form their party’s caucus, due their discriminatory actions and arguments. 

these are links to stories by vancouver media about the issue

CBC

metro news

global BC

huffington post

WOW

Many of us have preconceived notions about people’s accents. We find Western European accents—French, British, Castilian Spanish, Italian—relatively appealing, while Asian and Mexican accents are experienced as unintelligible or offensive… if an employee speaks French well and English only moderately well, we aren’t bothered. however, if Filipinos, for example, speak Tagalog to one another at work, the assumptions are that they are purposefully excluding English-speakers, that they are not trying to learn English, and that they don’t care. A mean-spirited quality is attributed to the behavior.

Frances E. Kendall, Understanding White Privilege 

White supremacy doesn’t regard non-white languages as real languages, it regards them as deviant forms of communication reduced to broad ethnic strokes (“Indian”, “Asian”, “African”) that is unacceptable because it is seen as an affront to white/euro hegemony.

(via notafuckingwizard)

(Source: brutereason, via becauseiamawoman)

What you’re really saying when you’re against self diagnosis:

theconcealedweapon:

1. Everyone should be assumed neurotypical and should be forced to act neurotypical, until proven otherwise.

2. Everyone who has been unable to get diagnosed for any reason should suffer in silence.

(via anaparamo)